What to say to any pregnant woman on earth who is close to her due date

For some bonkers reason, pregnant women are given a due date of 40 weeks after the first day of their last period, even though the average day of arrival for first and second babies hovers around to week 41 . So, odds are that if you know a pregnant lady, it’s likely she’ll go past her due date. And odds are, if her due date is looming, and you happen to like her, you’re going to wonder what’s going on. You’ll want to text or call her to see how things are going.

It’s quite likely that without meaning to, you’ll say something that makes her feel like this:

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Photo by istolethetv

Never fear, dear readers. Now you can be spared from making this easy mistake. I have two friends who just had their first baby (2 weeks past their due date, surprise!) and they came up with this easy way to determine if your comment to the very pregnant woman is worth putting out there.

It is very simple.

This is it:

Your comment should end in a period, not a question mark.

YES: “We’re thinking about you so much and are here if you need us.”

NO: “Do you need anything?”

YES: “I’m so excited to meet the baby.”

NO: (And this is quite possibly the biggest no of all.) “Baby yet?” or “Any baby?” or any question remotely like this.

Quite simply, waiting to go into labor can be ridiculously unnerving, and while it’s lovely to know that the people you love are thinking about you, it sucks to feel required to talk to them or to answer stupid questions. If you convey your support and curiosity in a statement, then your pregnant lady has the choice of whether or not to get back to you.

So keep those comments confined with periods, people. That way, you can rest easy knowing that you didn’t annoy the crap out of her and that she knows you’re one of the supportive and thoughtful ones.

9 thoughts on “What to say to any pregnant woman on earth who is close to her due date

  1. Bravo Ms. Honest Mom! Bravo. As someone who just went through this, I whole-heartedly second the “statements, not questions” approach. We’ll tell you when there’s a baby fer crissake. So please don’t ask.

    Best commen we heard was simply “We’re thinking about you.”

    Also–don’t try to circumvent the mom by asking the dad. They get annoyed too. =)

  2. Oh I can’t help but start to ask, “how are you feeling?” and then trying to stop myself from asking because it is so annoying to hear that every single time you see someone! Good responses.

  3. Hmm. Mildly resistant. I get it, I get it, but I’m hoping my dear friends would know that I’m always trying my best/asking out of love and if they want to tell me to shut up, they can. But maybe that’s because no one annoyed me when they asked me, “any baby yet?”

    1. Susie–I think any one instance of asking a question is not annoying in and of itself, but the cumulative effect of seemingly hundreds of people asking is what wore us down. We would have spent the final weeks of pregnancy doing nothing but responding to well-wishers if we hadn’t simply turned off our phones. That’s why a statement is better than a question in my mind — doesn’t require a response.

      On Mon, Mar 24, 2014 at 10:43 AM, An Honest Mom wrote:

      > Susie Meserve commented: “Hmm. Mildly resistant. I get it, I get it, > but I’m hoping my dear friends would know that I’m always trying my > best/asking out of love and if they want to tell me to shut up, they can. > But maybe that’s because no one annoyed me when they asked me, “any ba” >

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